What does your post have to do with having a moody bf? Do you have a bf? I don’t think so because  I sense a veiled attempt to relay that you think the guy you mention should dump his gf for you. I wonder what would happen if he did? Maybe you’d be subject to whatever treatment she’s getting, then you’d be sorry. Or at least discover the empathy for gf that you’re lacking now.
We were married in 2007,its was an arranged marriage in India but settled in Melbourne, Australia.we had a baby this 2011 July. This March 2012 I discovered my husband has been seeing another woman. And then in a month I discovered that he was trying to bed more women when I was overseas with my lil son from Nov 2011 to Feb 2012.his call summaries had text and call logs at weird hours.one if them is still a mystery cos she has never told me wat hapned between them.
we have been together for 17 years and married for 14, yes after time we did not value you each other, and our marriage became a chore when i found out he was on a chat site. he told me then he was not happy but only after i found out he was on the chat site. but never before that, i have found messages and pics on his phone. i literally have to sneak his phone when he has passed out as he keeps that phone so close to him he never lets it out of his site even if he goes to the loo. he told me he wanted a divorce with a sms message> but still wants me only for sex……. i just give in because I love him.
Started out an amazing sex life. About 4 years ago we started having problems in general and fighting a lot. Well he lost his job and our relationship got better. A lot better. We started having fun together all the time. My husband and I have an amazing “working” relationship. We never really fight anymore. The problem comes in here. 3 years ago I started to notice our sex life slipping so I asked him what he thought we should work on. He said it was too much work to have sex. So I took all the work out for him. Time went on and he still never had intrest in having sex and always turning me down 6 months went by and I freaked out on him and he said let’s start grunge to have a baby. We had sex 5 times over 2 months and got pregnant. I begged him and asked why why why he never wants me during the pregnancy. He could never answer me. We have talked about this soooo many times. Now my son is 7 months old. About 3 months ago was our last conversation about our sex life and he said you are just so cold and you never will let me near you!
Last night we went out and really didn’t drink much at all. I was clear and sober through the entire night, and I thought he was too. We went to a couple of bars, had one drink at each, and moved on. When we got to the last one, my husband decided that we should have a shot of something, but I am not sure what it was, I was busy loading the jutebox with Christmas music. After the shot, I got a mild buzz, so I figured he did too. We left the bar and walked toward home. On the way home, it happened again. He started screaming at me about something having to do with my son and I walked away. I had no interest in another fight. He yelled at me to get out of his house and that I was not taking my son. I yelled back at him not to worry, I would and as he has no rights to my child, I would be taking him with me. My son, by the way, was at hhis grandmothers house, where he goes every Thursday and every other weekend for visitation with his grandparents and his father. My husband ran up behind me, grabbed me by my hair, and dragged me about a half a block back, telling me that I was not going back to the house, I was not welcome. He did this twice. Being that I was now in pain, I screamed for help both times, to which he replied that there was noone to help me. I called his sister, whose house it is that we lived at. By this point I was hysterical. When he realized who I called, he cussed at me and stormed off toward the house. I started walking the other direction, with the idea in my head that I would walk the 15 miles it was to my son’s grandmother’s house and sleep in the boat she has on the lawn. My sister-in-law came and picked me up, taking me back to her house. She told me to go to bed and lock the door, he would sleep on the couch. Now it is morning, he is alseep on the couch, and I am still angry that he had the nerve to threaten my relationship with my child. I am also a little scared, he had never put his hands on me before. I don’t know what to do. Any help would be appreciated.
The most effective way to help others become happier, then, very well may be by focusing on becoming happy ourselves. This may strike some as selfish, but we can easily imagine flowing readily from our own happiness a heightened ability to encourage, support, and inspire. One strategy we shouldn't adopt, no matter how tempting it may be, is to give our unhappy loved ones what they ask for automatically without carefully considering the consequences. What unhappy people want is so often not what they need that this knee-jerk approach must in the end be considered unwise at best. We may feel impelled to give them what they want by our own sense of urgency to pry them out of whatever unhappy box they're in. But this urge often rises from our discomfort, not theirs, and causes us to suspend our good judgment in favor of what seems expedient.
I left my boyfriend of 15 yrs because I thought I wanted more. I was completely wrong. I told him 3 months ago and he said he still loves me and wants to come back home bit he hasn’t yet. He lives with another girl because he needed somewhere to go. He’s at my house alot but not home. It kills me everyday to not know if I should give up or wait on him.
The other problem I'm currently having is trying to get my husband to explore what exactly is making him unhappy. I asked him to try to write things down or email them to me when they come to mind so that we can work on them. He replied that he told me all of that when he told me he was unhappy in the first place. I was listening to him then, but I was also in a little bit of shock, and can't remember everything he said. any suggestions on how to oppen him up to actively working out why he is unhappy?

Look for signs your boyfriend isn't happy. These signs include a sudden lack of interest in intimacy, frequent desire to be alone, inattentiveness toward you, insensitivity to your feelings, or frequently engaging in activities without you. These may be signs of something else going on in his life, but they are likely signs his feelings for you are changing.
i am also going through the same, the man I have been with for 7 years going to 8 just left me and we just had a baby. he treats me so bad to an extent that I just see it as normal. when he is happy I should be happy but when he is unhappy he also wants me to be happy, he swears at me today and the next day he tells me he loves me. I know they say you should fight for what you believe in and fight 4 your man but after he just decided to leave me without no reason , I have just decided to stop believing and just focus on my own happiness, you can love someone so bad but sometimes love is not enough when it makes you miserable, love is supposed to make you happy.
Men CAN BE sexually desirable in and of themselves. Most straight males in most countries still don’t want to put the effort into becoming physically/sexually attractive, though. The majority won’t go the extra mile; the majority don’t even know where to start. They like to look like “clones” in a way. Basically the same style, hair cut, shoes, whatever. Won’t groom properly. Un-charming, hardened demeanor. No sensuality. It’s difficult to desire someone like that, at least passionately and strongly. That’s the reason so many millennial women love gay porn, and younger generations are so attracted to foreign males. Look at… Read more »
I didn't find out I was pregnant until I was around 8 weeks, and before this I would always talk about babies, and my boyfriend would always say it wasn't the right time. When we found out I was pregnant he was shocked at first and was adamant that we couldn't keep it (I told him there and then that I would be keeping the baby with or without him). We didn't talk about it for a couple of days as I wanted him to process the information in his own way and time, and then after about a week he just turned around and was fine with it haha. I'm now 25weeks, and he's more excited to meet his little girl than I am! 

I spent 42 years of my life with a moody man. It was hell. I ran after him like a puppy trying to keep peace in our home, especially for our children. I lost all respect for him. Yet we were both committed to making it work. Sometimes I think he did his best, but his best was a moody mess. There was a specific moment, after all those decades, when I said, “I’m done”, and I never looked back. We are friends. I value him, but I no longer have to put up with moods. I was desperate for peace, and now I have it. To those of you who are young and making decisions about a relationship, and the man is moody, I say “run, run, run, run”. It will only get worse after marriage. It is not up to you to “make him happy”. Your life will be ruined, and he will stay the same.
"Wife" and "independent woman " seems to be a contradiction BUT..anyway, one point is good to remember(just my opinion) is that if you're too proud (stephanie) or lazy to do these things, there is a woman somewhere watching and waiting. She do these things for him. She is at his job, church golf resort, gym. she's your best friend or even your relative. I think women have an instinctive way to tell that a man isn't being taken care of at home. Get rid of pride and take care of your man.
This same approach should be applied to the other things he does that may bother you from time to time. Don't get hung up about things, and if he does something that you really dislike, just let him know. Holding on to little things and petty grudges is not a good idea for you or your husband. Many of the little annoyances you may have you will forget about in a few weeks anyway, so it is not worth it to get upset over them.
My husband and I are happily married 5 years now, with two little ones at home under the age of 3. We make sure to have time for a date night every 2 weeks, one trip a year just the two of us and then tons of family time. We communicate tons, have some fights but always make sure to go to bed happy. I think marriage is worth it, and it has been proven that children in families with parents that stay together are better off than those in broken families. So I think the parents need to do everything and try everything to keep their marriage happy & fun for themselves & their children! I think people are way too selfish in many cases and underrate the value of a solid marriage. Our grandparents were right when they stayed together – and were able to enjoy their grandchildren & old age together as well.

My plan is to catch them in act and confronted. I wanted to know how long has this been going on and why. I will ask her what she is planning to do with it. If she still wanted to carry on with the guy, then I have to divorce and take custody of my son and move on life. But thinking about it makes me feel like vomiting. I do really love her so much and can’t bear leaving her. What should I do?
Hi. I’ve been with my boyfriend for almost two years. We’ve always been having ups and downs but always come out on the other side. I think he is an amazing person and I admire him a lot. We both have very strong personalities and this is really our first adult relationship. I’ve grown to love him. A lot. In spite of all our issues. I wouldn’t want him out of my life. Since recently he’s been miserable to me. Always agitated and frustrated. When I confronted him about it he said hes hurt by all our arguments and he sees that when he looks at me. This makes me very sad. I work with him and I can’t imagine going to work everyday and working side by side with him and he feels this way. He said he feels like he’s in relationship with someone he doesn’t want… I don’t know him like this and I have no clue what to do. I want to save my relationship and help him to forgive me. I do love him. And I don’t want to lose him. I don’t know if I’ve been my best and fairest with him. And I feel guilty when I know I’ve hurt him. I’ve loved the life I’ve had with him and I truly can’t stand to see him miserable. I want to do something about it. I treasure him and I want to build back our relationship. Please help me
This may seem like an obvious statement, but very important. I'm not just saying have sex a couple of times a week. Be totally invested in the act as much as possible. Sex is a very important and essential act to men. Show him you love him by loving on him. Get into the act and set your insecurities aside. This is the man you said your vows to and are going to spend the rest of your life with. Explore each other's bodies and have fun. Try to initiate sex some of the time as that will spice things up and make your husband even more excited for some fun in bed.
I guess I am not the only one. He cheated on me multiple times. He kept texting other girls but wont text me. I saw a girl dressing up in his bedroom on his phone but he told me a friend visited with his girlfriend and they took his phone. I had to believe him because I love him. He will break up with me when he goes through my phone and realize a guy texted me. Just recently, I went to the house and the while place was locked but he was inside with a woman. I went to the back where the bedroom window is and I heard him talking with a woman. I called and he told me he’s not home. Am just devastated. What is wrong with me? Am I not beautiful enough?
If your relationship has become one big boring routine, that's not good. If you guys always do the same thing - get food at the same place, watch TV, see a movie or lay in bed - it's a sign that something is wrong. You need to switch things up in order for there to be excitement. It's easy to fall into that pattern, but what matters is how you get out of it. My boyfriend and I do the same thing a lot during the week, but on weekends we try to have special date nights. We also always try to go on little vacations or go skiing. If you're not doing this stuff, it's probably because you're really bored.
What does your post have to do with having a moody bf? Do you have a bf? I don’t think so because  I sense a veiled attempt to relay that you think the guy you mention should dump his gf for you. I wonder what would happen if he did? Maybe you’d be subject to whatever treatment she’s getting, then you’d be sorry. Or at least discover the empathy for gf that you’re lacking now.
Visitation without me around scares me, especially if he goes down the angry road again, or simply the unhappiness road. The other day, he told me he failed at his workout goal. I said, well, at least you tried! He said he got close to his goal, but failed - he was 6 seconds off of the goal - we had a discussion about failure/trying your best is success...I worry for my daughter that this will be his perspective - He quoted Yoda - there is no try, do or do not...He told me we have different point of views and he didn't want to get into an argument about it. The only reason I held my ground and talked with him about it at all is b/c I worry that my daughter will be seen as a failure at some point. He tried and succeeded in keeping it a pleasant discussion. But the perspective scares me, especially if I am not there to remind my daughter that (if something similar happens to her) she is a success - just for trying her best!
I know exactly what this woman is talking about.  I’m dating a man where I feel like I’m losing my skill at bantering, and frankly, I find his ‘humor’ often to be not very complimentary.  I want someone who ‘gets’ me and vice versa.  Otherwise, it’s an awfully long time to live day in and day out with someone and/or needing to get this ‘need’ met from outside the marriage (and I don’t mean CHEATING).
My problem is I’m not able to reason with her at all over the last few years, only if it’s in line with what she thinks is right. I’ve reached a point where I can’t go on arguing over stupid things because it’s at the point that I can’t deal with it and I don’t even care if my life ended. I have some health issues as well. By no means am I saying it’s always her fault, but I’m sick of it. If she told me to leave I would just to have a piece of mind. She doesn’t want me to have a dog, which I’ve had in the past,she gets upset over basically nothing and has an attitude till I apologize for something that wansnt even my fault. I’m not perfect by any means. This is a a very SMALL idea of want I have to deal wIth daily.
I would think yes!! If you feel suicidal it’s 100% accurate that you should safely get out of the relationship asap. When we lose sight of who we are and feel hurt enough we feel suicidal it’s that very moment we must know a severe change needs to be made! You must choose to take care of your self first before you can start to help your husband with the way he feels about himself that drives him to treat you in this manner to begin with. Get yourself grounded and begin to work on what you feel is broken in you first. Once you start to see YOUR OWN needs and what is truly important to you without anyone else saving what they feel you can begin to build your marriage with a super strong foundation that can stand the storms that will come for any marriage. All marriages take 100% effort from both sides 50/50 is a good way to see it since as long as you both go 1/2 way you will always meet in the middle but you must remember you CAN ONLY do YOUR part. I hope this helped you. Be safe God bless and take care.
If you're hoping to build something long-term, it's important that you plan a little bit together or be willing to cooperate and remain flexible. If your partner discusses their own future and doesn't imagine you as part of it then they're probably not planning on building a future with you. This could mean marriage, kids, or even just your bucket list.
For whatever reason, you feel dependent enough on your boyfriend that you can't imagine being without him. Maybe it's because he always fixes your car, pays for your stuff and lends you money, makes you feel less alone or gives you something to do. Whatever the reason, don't stay with someone you are too dependent on - stay with someone if you genuinely want to be with them!
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So, you need to figure out if you’re just going through the normal ups and downs of marriage…or if you’re truly not in love with him. How do you do that? You could try individual counseling, couples therapy, or even Mort Fertel’s “alternative to therapy” (a friend of mine LOVES how Fertel coaches marriages — his ad is at the end of my article above).
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Like starting fires, starting fights left and right is not OK. "When your partner starts answering the simplest question you ask with an edge or a nasty attitude, you can bet your bottom dollar that your partner is fed up with you and the relationship," relationship coach and psychic medium Cindi Sansone-Braff, author of Why Good People Can't Leave Bad Relationships , tells Bustle. "This person may be trying to start a fight with you in order to end things."
HELLO MY NAME IS JANE I AM 44 YEARS OLD HAVE TWO BEAUTIFUL KIDS. MY HUSBAND AN I MARRIED FOR 19 YEARS. HE IS A GREAT FATHER AND HUSBAND. BUT WHAT HURT ME THE MOST IS HIS LIE , ALWAYS HAVE EXCUSE WENT I CAUGHT HIM IN A LIE.IF YOU ASK ME HOW MUCH I TRUST HIM ,I WOULD SAY ONLY 20 PERCENT.WHAT I FEEL INSIDE MY HEART IS I LOVE HIM AND DON’T TRUST HIM SOUND STUPID RIGHT. EVERY SINCE HE LOST HIS DAD HE DO THE DUMB THINGS, HE BLAME HIMSELF BECAUSE HE WAS NOT AROUND . I SAID TO HIM YOU ARE NOT JUST HURTING YOURSELF YOU ARE HURTING ME AND THE KIDS. HE OWE SO MUCH MONEY WHICH WE ARE PAYING OFF LITTLE BY LITTLE. WE HAS A TALK YESTERDAY AND I SAID TO HIM I FEEL BETTER IF YOU DON’T LIE TO ME AN TALK OUT THE PROBLEM WITH ME . I SAID NEVER GO TO BED ANGRY BUT YESTERDAY I COULD NOT SLEEP JUST WONDER WHAT I SHOULD DO?
get out, get out now, while you are still young. I was you 5 years ago. Don’t focus on the little details of why you can’t leave, your mental wellbeing and freedom are worth more. If you cannot find the strength to do so then find a councellor to help you find the strength and clarity you need. They can be pricey, but you would be amazed at what will come your way when you are ready for help. God be with you and be safe.
Also I have my children and don’t know how to explain to them about our marriage. But I am just not happy. I see other attractive men and am attracted to them. But have not cheated on my husband and I know he will never cheat on me. I just don’t know I also don’t feel amused by him I feel like a women should be proud of her partner and that’s just not my case. I take care of all the bills and problems of the house and feel like I have so much in my plate. We never go any where because there’s just no money ever. No vacation no nothing I think that has also taken a toll on me. I feel like am ready for something different. I cry every time after we have inter course just because I don’t feel anything I pretty much have to fake. And it hurts because this is not a life I want I feel and know that I have so much more ahead of me. But his low self esteem is what holds me back. Because he does love me but the feeling is not mutual.

Me an my husband have been married for two years now, we have a wonderful, healthy one year old together. My problem is, he’s quite a mommy’s or should I say grandmas boy. Before we got married he lived with his grandparents where his grandma did everything for him. She cooked, cleaned, did his laundry, made his bed, an waited on him hand an foot. Now that we are together I don’t mind cleaning, cooking, or any other house chores, but he expects me to do them without any help. I don’t get off work till 8pm an he cooks dinner alot I will admit that. He acts like I never do anything, he tells me if I only worked as hard as he has to. Mind you I’m a caregiver taking care of two different clients, an he is a cable guy. He tells me all the time I don’t care about the things he does for me, but I feel the same way. I’m to my breaking point I can’t take his put downs an him saying my job means nothing. I don’t want to leave him, but something has to change.
First of all, I would like to say he isn’t this way very often but when he is, it’s a little scary. Un-nerving. He becomes volatile very quickly. And you never know if he’s going to be that way when you open the door or his normal self. It’s exhausting. I can’t relax, I feel like I have to be on constant guard. He complains that we don’t have sex enough, that I don’t initiate it enough, that when he gets that way, all I have to do is take him to the bedroom. I thought at first that he was kidding. I think he is angry at me but he strikes out (harsh words) at the kids to me because he knows it gets to me.
I can’t say it will last and I can’t say I am happy but she didn’t do anything and neither did I. Sometimes we get into a funk and it lasts a very long time. I know some people are incapable of giving us what we need even when we spell it out for them. They are unwilling,unable, or have some personal,religous,or family taught or untaught traits that damage a long term relationship.
There are times when I feel so miserable and powerless. He says all the right things when he’s himself. He will tell me I am beautiful, he loves me, his heart beats for me, and how he wants us to get past this area in life where we don’t agree on anything. I don’t think the problem is so much that we don’t agree as I do he won’t let that stand. He thinks if he talks to me long enough, whatever the issue, I will see it his way. When that doesn’t happen, he gets more angry. Then I am stupid, naive, and an idiot that can’t see past the end of my nose.
So I met my husband in September we married in January after knowing each other for a very long time. At the start it was amazing touchy Feely all over each other never wanting to be too far from each other intimacy was amazing we have been married 6 months and I'm not happy his phone is more important than coming to bed at night with me might get to me between 2 and 4am our sex had stopped he hadn't touched me since February he goes to work comes home and on his phone his phone is his best friend I tried yo tell him when we first got married to at least put it down to have our time and then things got worse. He thinks it's all me and not talking about it but I dong want to be a bitch and start cursing at him I have no idea what to do he's in it forever and we'll I'm not I feel lonely trapped and don't like being married can anyone help me
I don’t want to sound like I have no sympathy for your boyfriend. Life can be tough, especially in light of thwarted dreams, unrealistic expectations, financial instability, flimsy support networks, and run-of-the-mill insecurities. But not everyone deals with things in the same way; and, whether we like it or not, this stuff matters. There are some people who will give up online dating if one email is not returned or give up on relationships just because the last one went bad. Even if this is somewhat “normal,” it’s certainly not a healthy trait. Not for the anxious/moody person, and not for the poor soul who has to be the strong, patient partner. When your boyfriend is unhappy, it’s only normal to want to pull him out of it, to want to flip a switch in the back of his head to get him from pessimist to optimist. Furthermore, when he’s at his worst internally, that’s also when he’s a terrible boyfriend. He obsesses, stays at home, stews in his own juices, and builds up stories about what’s wrong in the world that may not accord with reality. Not only that, but such a boyfriend has nothing to give to the relationship because he’s always dealing with his own mercurial moods.

I think you first need to decide if you want to continue on in this relationship the way it is right now. Then, you need to make that decision work any way you can….some women leave their marriages and rely on social services or family members for help….other women stay in less-than-perfect marriages because that’s the best option for them….but the happiest people are those who make their own choices and focus on ways to be happy no matter what…
Ok, so i am the woman & I cheated! no excuses but I had a rough childhood, oldest & only girl helping a single drug addicted mother raise 3 lil boys! my mom paid me no attention, so i sought it elsewhere & became a teenage mom-like my mom! i have always tried hard to make my mom proud of me-well to no avail & i’m 34 now! well, my husband & i have been together 10 yrs, married for 4yrs & separated for the last 2, since i cheated!
known my wife 50 yes been married 43, Can’t stand to talk to her,eat with her be around her.I have so much animosity toward her I get ill just looking at her. For the last 20yrs its like talking to wall.She never does what she says she will do. I feel like i have been beating a dead horse.Try everything to save marriage but nothing has worked So now I have shut down.We are just existing together.We got married at the age of 21 me and her 19.Tried to have affair felt to guilty could not perform.No sex or contact of any kind just passing time. Lord how it ever get this screwed up.
My current relationship is not completely lacking laughter but I am often consumed with thoughts of “Can I live my whole life with a man who’ll never have a witty come back?” Because we have such open communication I’ve been able to explain my feelings to him. It has not upset him that I’m still unsure in our relationship, but for me it has been causing stress from indecision.
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My husband has been unfaithful. I learned last year that he was. He says he love me and want our marriage but, he is still with his mistress & denies it. We have never had locked phones. And I have never seen his phone down in a year. It’s always on him. He lies & the cheated has affected his company because of the lack of work. I have no clue what to do. He never shows me any different. Other that I don’t make him feel special, but I do anything he asked. Now I am at the last rope. We have 3 young children & i am searching for work incase of the worse. Does anyone have any advice. Plus he says he depressed. And need me, but it’s the same thing over & over.
But that's not your best bet: "Staying in a seriously unhappy marriage can have long-term effects on our mental and emotional health," says Carrie Cole, a couples therapist and Master Certified Gottman Therapist by the Gottman Institute. Research shows that people in bad marriages usually have low self-esteem, struggle with anxiety and depression, and have a higher rate of illness than those who don't. People feel sad and grieve when they decide to let go — but people who divorce do recover emotionally, and Cole says most find new relationships. In fact, "one statistic reported that 85 percent of those who divorce remarry within five years," she says.
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